aint perfect

I Still Like Angelina Jolie: Refer Back to GIA If In Doubt

So here’s a link (Angelina Jolie Vanity Fair article) to the first interview Angelina Jolie’s given since her split from Brad Pitt.

Of course she doesn’t give away too much. We knew she wouldn’t. Angelina definitely doesn’t seem like a person who just up and spills the beans.

Anyways, after the final line of the article I was left with the feeling of still liking Angelina, even though we’ve, or really I’ve, had my ups-and-downs in relation to how much I like or love her.

angelina jolie gia ad

(Angelina Jolie in Gia: check this one out, I don’t think you’ll be disappointed)

I fell in love with Angelina Jolie in grade 9 (. I remember renting the HBO movie about the supermodel, Gia Carangi, who was HIV positive. Gia was a wild woman, bi-sexual, an intravenous drug user, and played by the gorgeous Angelina Jolie. Do I think Jolie’s normal? If normal means a version of a person I come across many times over, then no. I don’t know if I’ve ever seen anyone quite as beautiful as Jolie in real life. She is a freak of nature and a very good freak at that.

Gia Carangi

(The real life Gia Carangi: captivating)

Plus, I got to see Angelina’s gorgeous body naked, with her boobs smashing up against a fence on a photo shoot set in the film. My Mom, I think because she was a much older married-man’s mistress for all of my post-pubescent years, tried to be overly pious in her views as a way to counterbalance her own less than savoury lifestyle and source of income. Anyways, due to my Mom’s own issues, I wasn’t allowed to really be sexual, look sexy, talk about sex, think of having or enjoying sex, etc., so it was a big guilty pleasure for me to get to see this wild behaviour on screen since my own grade 9 life was boring. Also, I was a bit overweight, not confident in my looks or self, and an outcast in some of my classes who guys definitely avoided and definitely weren’t into, so the life of Gia as played to perfection by Jolie was an ultimate fantasy for me. I wished I could be like Gia/Jolie (minus all of the bad stuff that happened to
Gia/Jolie)!

What affected me the most after seeing my first Angelina Jolie film was that even though I thought at the time she was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen, I wanted to hang out with her. I actually felt better about myself while watching her. I felt like if we were hanging she’d be nice to me, get me, and see the beauty in me. Yes, those are big mental leaps to make just from watching her in Gia, but that was what her performance invoked in me. Usually, when I watched people like Gwyneth Paltrow, I didn’t feel good about myself after. I felt like I wasn’t skinny enough, cool enough, and I didn’t think Gwynnie would even notice me if we met.

Angelina just seemed to have a big heart and a love for people. I have no idea why other than maybe I felt that because that is who she is to most people. Unless you cross her. I’m sure she’s done cruel things to Brad Pitt. I’m sure he’s done cruel things to her.

But at the end of the day, as this article reminded me, even though they look so perfect, there is still something about them people love and I think it is a vulnerability.

At the end of the Vanity Fair article, Jolie says, “Let’s embrace not being normal”. This is all I can do, as I’m too damaged and weird to ever be normal again. Anyone who loves to not be normal is someone I want to hang out with.

Angelina maybe you stole someone’s husband, I don’t know and I actually don’t care if you did, I still love you and I’m a fan in 2017 just as I was watching Jolie in Gia in 1999.

SOUTHERN CHARM SAVANNAH: Ashley Purges In More Ways Than One/Hannah’s Dad Drops A Bomb

We hear Catherine’s voice doing the recap of the episode from last week. I wanna know why is boring Catherine the narrator? Dumb decision.

First off Hannah is packing for the trip to her dad’s place for a tailgate party.

Louis says, “Planning a party with your dad is so easy,” and that you just send people for more alcohol. Hannah gets all uppity about this not surprisingly.

Hannah then tells the camera that, “this is a perfect opportunity for him to show me that he is carrying the weight around here”. Yes, I do have an inkling suspicion that Hannah is subconsciously punishing Louis for her father’s wrongs.

Then it’s on to Nelson picking up Ashley at her place. I’m pretty sure Nelson can be heard screaming, “Go dawgs sick em,”  to cheer on the sports team they’re going to the tailgate party for. Nelson would be so much fun to go to a sports game with. That means a lot since I think sports are one of the most boring things to watch, but Nelson is a hoot! Nelson spinoff anybody? I bet it’s gonna happen with Ashley and Nelson taking on the big city (NYC) or celeb central (LA).

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(Nelson and Ashley earlier in the season)

I noticed during Ashley and Nelson’s drive that Nelson is wearing nice sunglasses. This is an improvement from the rest of his fashion (except for his glorious bow ties).

During the car trip, Ashley is bitching to Nelson about how Hannah should have been more considerate about going to a different designer/clothing maker in Charleston, when this is already Ashley’s livelihood. After Ashley says, ‘This is what pays for this car” Nelson’s agreement is given in the form of a very long and hilarious “Hmmmmm”. Nelson’s got some attitude in him and it’s quite entertaining. Yeah, he has been caught lying, but being fun goes a long way as well.

“Obviously I hate the tension with Hannah…If it turns sour, I know I have somewhere to go,” is what Ashley says about the Hannah feud (Ashley has access to her family or friend’s place to stay), since Ashley rightly fears that the power dynamic between her and Hannah could be unequal due to the party being on Hannah’s territory.

Hannah is so annoying! “I’m going to get the breakdown from my dad too about how much you actually did?” Why are you conspiring to get your boyfriend into trouble with your dad, Hannah? Stop caring so much what your damn dad thinks. He’s insensitive clearly.

Hannah says she gets anxiety driving up to beach house and we also find out that this is a 70-person party Louis ordered catering for. “My mom and dad built the house when I was in high school. We’ve had a lot of really fun family memories here, but it’s my dad and Sara’s house now. It’s just different,” Hannah says as she admits she hasn’t quite let go of the past yet.

Hannah says, “My stepmom and I are close in age, but not close”. Ouch! I wish I could know what Sara’s experience of the whole situation is. Hannah seems like a pretty stuck-up bitch at times, so I bet Hannah is hard to deal with. It seemed like Hannah left her stepmom out during one scene by focusing only on the people to her right, including Louis and her dad, rather than open it up for Sara to be a part of it. Sara kind of grabs at Hannah’s beer, and it was a tad awkward.

Then there’s Catherine reading some article about Ashley online. Ashley apparently got into an argument with a neighbour and busted the neighbour’s window. I want to hear more about this situation.

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(Lyle and Catherine looking virginal and boring as per usual)

Lyle is such that bitch who will never be able to attract an Ashley, so he pretends to crap on her, though he couldn’t handle her if he had the chance to. My analysis is why Lyle says, “She’s (Ashley’s) also an aggressive knocker along with aggressive bullshitter”. Harsh.

Then the ultimate NAGFEST tailgate party of 2017 (maybe 2016 depending on when it was filmed) by bugging Louis about everything in the most irritating way possible: “And it’s off to a rocky start…” is Hannah’s contribution to things early on. If Hannah only knew the reason this episode is so rocky is because her dad got too drunk and spilled the beans in a shocking way. Louis is an angel comparatively speaking.

When Hannah and her dad are talking, Hannah’s dad says, “Maybe i better have a talk with him”. What did Louis do that’s wrong? Their lifestyles must be too different from mine to get how not obsessing over running a party that is supposed to be fun is a bad thing.

Miss Control Freak Hannah says, “Every time i go to take a deep breath and a take a seat back…the ball has been dropped”. This is a party not a life or death surgery woman.

Hannah and her dad start doing it all themselves. 15 minutes later louis shows up on a golf cart

“You left,” Hannah says to Louis. She takes him around the side of the house for privacy in front of the cameras (haha, sure) to ream him out: “You’re hosting a party so stay ut until everything is finished and our guests arrive”. Hannah she is good at talking in a condescending manner. I wouldn’t want her to be my boss, cause I’d want to tell her to go get that fungal parasite removed from her asshole (jokes…don’t think Hannah would ever lower her guard long enough to pick up a fungal parasite, if there is such a thing), cause it’s really affecting her ability to focus on what matters.

“This is such bullshit,” is how Louis responds and I personally think he is right.

Hannah attempts to further degrade her boyfriend by calling him a vagina (not that it’s bad to be a vagina, if you can be a vagina, because vaginas are actually amazing): “You got to get that little tale feather out from underneath that vagina down there”. Nice girlfriend.

Hannah then pulls out another snot move by saying about tin foil top, “It’s just really TPT looking…trailer park trash”. Oh Hannah, aren’t you hilarious for making fun of those who aren’t as swanky as you?

SOUTHERN CHARM SAV catherine happy hannah pouring drinks

(Basic bitches Catherine, Happy, and Hannah)

Then it’s Happy’s turn once again to come in and make Hannah’s voice sound like smooth butter in comparison to Happy’s nasally whine. Happy is talking about Ashley when she says, “I want to pull her aside and have a conversation with her…Every time I turn around she’s like screaming at you”.  This girl Happy seriously irritates the fuck out of me. Catherine then repeats the rumour about Ashley punching out a window to the other girls. I can see where the conflict in this episode is heading: all signs point to Ashley. Bravo, Ashley (pun intended): $$$.

Happy says, “I struggle with feeling sad and then I hear things like this and I think this isn’t sad this is madness”. Okay there. Happy may be willing to be the black sheep of her family in terms of marrying a muslim person (since her mom at least isn’t supportive of her marriage), but she sure is judgmental and stuck-up about other things, so that judgmental trait must run in her family (it runs in my family too…can’t you tell?).

ASHLEY AND NELSON INCOMING: Ashley and Nelson show up to finally spice up the party. “Go dawgs!” Nelson say as he cheers on the team. Nelson is RIDIC. I want to hang out with Nelson so bad.

Ashley has a bandaid on her hand (window smasher!) and Catherine asks what happened. Ashley says, ‘Long story”. Perfect answer as she neither confirms nor denies, which is a great way to drag out the drama.

Happy asks Ashley, “How’s it going?” as the intro to their chat. Happy is constipated sounding. You need that rock solid piece of shit out of your ass, Happy or else you’re going to be stuck sounding like that forever. That was too harsh I know, but she really is the series villain for me.

Happy further chastises Ashley by saying, “It’s really really difficult to do that (support Ashley) when i feel like you’re acting in ways that I don’t understand that seem irrational”. I can see where Happy is coming from somewhat, it’s her delivery that sucks.

Ashley gives it right back, “Like what?”. Followed by, “You guys can’t just let me have a fun event”. Tell it like it is, girl!

Happy makes another annoying yet valid point when she asks Ashley, “Do you not feel like you’re attacking, Hannah?”.

“No one cares if i’m upset. It sucks,” Ashley shares while letting down her guard. It is correct that she’s kind of alone (except for Nelson) in this series.

Then the conversation turns to relationships and how Ashley knows Dennis is sweet, but he’ll never stand up for her and have her back in public.

Happy snaps back at her, “You’ve chosen your situation. if you don’t like it then get out of it”.

“I think that’s a very naive thing for her to say to me,” is how Ashley responds and I think she is correct. I’m unmarried and not a parent, so while I can see Ashley and Dennis’ relationship is unhealthy for Izzy (as Ashley can see too), it doesn’t mean breaking up a family is easy or something someone does rashly.

Ashley further sucks me in to loving her when she admits, “I’ve never made a decision based solely on what I wanted…”. I think there are many women who feel the same way about their lives, even if they won’t admit it on national television.

Ashley continues, “A lot of it is hard for me to deal with…That’s why I get defensive…I can’t survive on a daily basis if I focus on the struggles that I have…”. Amen! That is my life too. Just got to keep on moving, right? I think everyone is there, though levels of struggles are very different for all people.

Happy turns a bitchy-corner and seems like someone I could grow to like when she tell Ashley, “Right now, I feel like I understand where your’e coming from”. Ashley cries and hugs are given all around. Heartwarming stuff, but will it last? We shall see.

Grayson, Louis’ friend, pulls Nelson into the pool with him. Ashley jumps in and everyone else joins the pool part of the party. Grayson seems like he should be on the show too!

Now it’s BOYS ONLY (are we 10? I would not be cool with this if it was my boyfriend unless it was a pre planned boys night out…if I’m a female and I wanna come, I will) are going to the bar. We see shots of party time in da club. Daniel drops it loooowwww.

Then there’s Nelson droppin’ it with his hands. One more reason why I want to go out dancing with Nelson so bad! If you’re ever in Vancouver, Nelson, hit me up and I’ll take you to a fun hip hop club.

“You don’t have to be everything for everybody,” Hannah says to a haaaammmmed Ashley. Hannah is such a lecturer and so bitchy. Ahhh! Ashley starts barfing all over herself.

Now for the most shocking part of the episode with Louis and Hannah’s much talked-about Dad speaks for himself when he should have kept his mouth shut. Alcohol is dangerous people! That’s why I can’t touch it. Truth serum is something you’ve got to watch out for, because alcohol can make a negative spin one’s entire reality. I’m hoping that Hannah’s dad, David, was just in a particularly negative mood that night.

Louis tells Hannah’s dad she is brilliant and basically professes his love for his (Hannah’s dad’s) daughter (Hannah). Hannah’s dad then says, “I can’t tell them (Hannah and her sisters) I was never in love with her (their mom and his ex-wife)” along with “never force anything”. Okay that is a lot to digest for me, and I’m just a viewer. Hannah’s mom doesn’t deserve to be talked about this way. It’s weird, it’s like why’d you stay with a woman you were never in love with? How was she supposed to know that? Did she know that?

SOUTHERN CHARM SAV hannah crying on porch

(I bet Hannah started crying when she watched this episode for the first time…I would)

Louis admits, “I’m totally confused. I don’t know why he is saying that to be”. Hannah’s dad is messed up…”I was never in love with her (Hannah’s mom)” is repeated multiple times to Louis while they’re at the bar.

Louis isn’t the same as Hannah’s dad, as Louis maintains, “I love Hannah. She’s my best friend. I don’t take that for granted”. I like Louis.

Nelson and Ashley are driving together. She brings up how Happy and the girls genuinely tried to understand her, and she’s thankful since, “It’s hard to be vulnerable with people when you feel like they don’t really care” Yes, that is so true. I can’t let down my guard if I feel like someone has already judged me.

The next day, Hannah’s dad, David, is on his deck. It’s funny how her dad got the drunkest,  not the wild young partygoers.

Her dad looks guilty on the porch. Hannah is teary eyed while talking about Louis’ supposed faults again to her dad, ‘I really need him (Louis) to just like step it up…I feel like we’re jusr kind of floating out here in this weird space. It’s kind of funny, but sometimes i’m just like come on man”. Again, Hannah is misdirecting her anger. Focus on your fucking douche dad. He is the one who disgraces you and your family by speaking like that.

This episode was nuts…and I’m getting deeper and deeper into these people’s lives as the season goes on. Since I watch reality TV to escape, that is a good thing. This show is shaping up to contend with the original Southern Charm.

SOUTHERN CHARM RECAP: Landon Surprises/Shep Sinks Lower

We see Thomas speaking to his bestie, the happily (it really does seem that way…I hope he’s not a cheater though) married father-of-four, JD about potential ladies T-Rav wants to wed. When the option of Landon comes up, JD says, “Of all the people in the universe, I don’t know if Kathryn would be real happy about that one.” JD really seems to get a kick out of all the unbelievable conundrums (to put it mildly) that Thomas gets himself into. I think JD loves Thomas and wants the best for him. But it also seems like JD is always entertained by these predicaments and JD wonders how Thomas can be surprised at the drama that surrounds him.

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(Landon, Thomas, and Jennifer…just friends? Step-mom Landon hmmm…)

Then we switch over to single, ripe-for-the-taking (if you can give Landon as many horses as she wants) Landon. She tells the camera that, “My Dad is a real estate developer. Everything he made is tangible, you can see it.” This is used to explain why he isn’t on board with Roam (new name please), and it’s lack of tangibility. The fact that the site can’t even claim its name definitely indicates that it’s likely to evaporate into thin air very quickly.

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(Landon and her ex husband)

Landon’s sweet dad tells her, “As a matter of fact, I’ve got a proposal for you”. Daddy offers Landon a 5 days a week job overseeing one of his development sites in Charleston, since he can’t be there to oversee it himself.

Instead of gratitude, Landon says, “This is a lot. I didn’t think that you were going to hit me with all this”. While a positive spin would be to say that Landon’s dad believes in her and is trying to give her a break with this job because he knows she can do it, Landon’s own mind (and maybe weak work ethic) makes her interpret his offer in a hurtful, condescending way.

Landon is sad her dad won’t acknowledge her site as a legitimate thing. Um, duh Landon, maybe that’s because even the most minor amount of research to see if your site name was available clearly wasn’t done effectively, if at all. About Roam Landon says, “It’s the first thing that I’ve ever done on my own as an adult that is just mine.” Landon says, “I want to do it on my own”.

I am not a fan of Landon in general, but her desire to be an independent woman and not take the easy way out did impress me this episode. I’ve never seen her clearly express that she knows it would be kind of pathetic to just fall into whatever fate offers her easy money to maintain her lifestyle.

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(One thing working for Landon is that she always looks good)

Landon knows it’d be easy to marry, but she says, “It’s kind of like giving up on myself. I’m betting on me”. I’m on TEAM LANDON then too in this instance!

Shep talks to Cameran about wanting to get married and the topic of Chelsea is brought up. “I think you’re scared of being vulnerable,” Cameran says to Shep and I agree wholeheartedly. Shep hasn’t worked enough and he feels like an unfulfilled loser because of it. I hate that work is necessary to feel good, but I’ve got to do something to feel ok about myself.

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(Shep seems to be full of shit)

Cameran says that if Shep tells Chelsea he wants to get to know her a little better, she would stop dating Austen. This whole episode made me start to wonder if Chelsea might be a real good actress, she has had me fooled or she is a really sweet person who also seems down to earth, because maybe she is using Austen as a tool to see if Shep really will go for her. I’m not saying I don’t think Chelsea doesn’t like Austen at all, I think there is a playful attraction there, but maybe in her gut Chelsea was hoping she’d be the one to change 37 year-old perma-child Shep Rose. I’ve done it myself and paid for it with my heart and sanity.

I think that men don’t change for you. Men can change, but it has to always start from somewhere inside I think, even if a change coincides with the meeting of a new potential dating partner. I don’t know if Shep’ll ever really be there, because to his detriment, money makes it so easy to not do anything.

“Is there any hope for Shepster?” Chelsea about Shep. The forecast is bleak on that one.

Austen and Chelsea. Asks her to meet his parents. Chelsea agrees. Either Chelsea is heartless, or Shep isn’t someone she’s secretly holding out for. It is NOT COOL to meet someone’s parents if you’re not in love with them. That’s just mean and misleading.

Austen and Chelsea are shown talking in a vehicle together. Chelsea says to Austen, “Shep did something really weird. And I’ve been torn if I should tell you or not. I feel like if roles were reversed I’d want you to tell me…he came to the back of the bar, he like grabbed my arm, and he was like I wanna talk to you…he immediately turns around and goes in to kiss me. He tried two or three times.”

“It is a cheap sly move,” is how Austen describes what Shep is said to have done.

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(Jennifer, Landon, Austen, Cameran and Chelsea)

Chelsea adds to how bad what Shep supposedly did by saying, “And you being inside the bar”.

“I just feel like that took some nerves,” is Chelsea’s final point (for now) on the topic. Chelsea also says Shep said everyone knows they have something special, and that Austen has a better connection with Landon. Landon is a flirt, and, no, I don’t think her and Austen have a connection.

Then there is a boys bar night. Before the Whitney and Shep arrive, Austen starts telling Craig about what Chelsea says happened.

Shep arrives at the drinking spot and Austen says, “I can’t believe he’s (Shep’s) able to act like nothing happened.”

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(Shep and Austen going at it)

Craig calls Shep out directly for his jealousy and of course Shep, the juvenile, denies the obvious. Austen brings up Chelsea’s story. Asks Shep if there is anything he wants to reveal. “Do you not think you were wrong in that?” Austen asks Shep. Shep claims he was doing it to protect Austen and to make sure Chelsea is genuinely into Austen. It was an act of kindness supposedly. Ridiculous.

“Craig, I am no lothario my friend,” Shep says in defense of these accusations.

Shep gets angry. “I gave you the chance to admit you’re doing somebody 500 times”. Oh, so Shep is still mad that Austen won’t open up about him and Chelsea. On this one area I’ll acknowledge Shep does have a point, because Austen hid his shit so Shep can kind of do that now too, but only to a degree, not to behave in a sexually aggressive manner like Chelsea described.

Shep points out Cameran keeps encouraging him to go after Chelsea. “Sometimes my maleness gets the better of me.” This is messed-up. Shep is kind of insinuating that his masculinity is so powerful that he couldn’t help but push way too far and grab Chelsea. That is the kind of thought process that has led people to justify sexual assaults, and therefore it repulses me. Shep then says, “Do you really think that I’d make someone go out with me? Maybe she likes me.”

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(Craig enjoys his chablis)

“Austen is really forcing this mirror in Shep’s face tonight,” is Craig accurately notes, and adds about Shep, “It’s really hard to look into that mirror and see someone you don’t like”. I think Craig loves Shep, but Shep was too critical of Craig, and I’d feel like Craig too, and a bit happy to see my friend judged after treating me poorly in the past. Immature? Yes. But I ain’t perfect.

Shep further acts a fool when we see a flashback where he says to Austen about Austen’s hook-up with Chelsea, “She went slumming with you. She wanted to see what a little blue collar was like”. Seriously Shep needs to stop drinking, because comments like that will always come out if you’re hammed.

Whitney keeps standing up for Shep, but this isn’t a shocker, as I think Whitney would stand-up for whomever he is closest to rather than even think about how is right or wrong in the situation. Blind loyalty is a little much for me.

The other friend at the bar (who isn’t a cast member) tells Shep what Austen said about him. Shep denies it. Austen says to Shep, “You have alluded to it a couple times. You said you don’t have enough money for her bro. Words out of your mouth”. Scott Disick from Keeping up with the Kardashians and Shep are kind of similar alcoholics in my opinion.

“You’re on very thin ice with me,” Shep says to Austen and he ends with the classic line,”You do you. I’ll do me. I don’t care I’ve got a million friends”.

You hear that, everybody? Shep is the most popular boy in school, I mean in life. Finally, “Let it go, man,” is what Whitney says to Austen. Shut up, Whitney, you’re an annoying bitch sometimes.

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(Thomas and Kathryn once upon a time…)

Thomas brings Kensie to the mommy-and-me modelling shoot with Kathryn. You can tell the parents are really trying, but they’re also tentative. Kensie looks really happy and they look like they have a future in modelling. At the end of the scene, Kensie doesn’t want to leave and keeps trying to get into her mother’s vehicle. It is sad as Kensie is crying a lot and eventually Thomas takes her and buckles her into her car seat. I definitely felt like I was contributing to traumatizing a child by watching that scene. Watching this unfold is too much and Kathryn goes inside and starts crying. Chelsea and the modelling agency woman comfort her. I want to see fun, snarky Kathryn and I hope her wit comes out as the season progresses. Right now, Kathryn’s scenes are too depressing.

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(l to r: Saint, Kathryn, and Kensie)

Chelsea and Cameran hang out. Chelsea tells Cameran Shep was trying to say it wasn’t his fault (his way too pushiness with Chelsea at the bar) because Cameran is always in his ear. Cameran admits that, “Maybe it is selfish of me because I love you both, and I want y’all to be together”.

“You see his lifestyle. As a friend, you shouldn’t want me to be…” Chelsea trails off. I’ll end the sentence myself “…with him”. Yep.

“He (Shep) gets away with it. I know so many guys like that…at some point, that can’t happen anymore” Chelsea about guys like Shep. Dead on! School him, please. This scene made me believe Chelsea isn’t orchestrating, or playing a role in, the drama around her, and that she really sees Shep for the entitled playboy he chooses to be at the present time. Cameran decides she is going to go chew him out.

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(Craig and Naomie during happier times…big ups to them for doing relationship work with a counsellor…my partner and I have too and it helps I think)

The therapy session between Craig and Naomie reminded me of fights between my boyfriend and I! He works in our apartment making music a lot, if he didn’t spend so much time on music I don’t think I’d find him an attractive partner (he has music is on reality TV show that airs on MTV2, so he gets legit jobs composing), but the current record he is working on will not pay out until his friend and him complete it and send it in to Music BC.

He also works in a restaurant, but I’ve been doing 8 hour shifts away from home 3-4 days of the week, and when I wake up and he sleeps in with the blinds drawn while I’m up and outside, I can harp on him for it. Seeing how Naomie talks to Craig though it reminds me that even if my frustration is justified, putting your partner down will only further de-motivate them and it won’t help life them up. So what I took away from this episode is that I need to stop dumping on my boyfriend.

Shep and Cameran meet up. Cameran says, “Well I think we’re going to have to save the love doll for somebody else”. That doll is cool though. I want one!

“I saw a bright, shiny object like a fish,” is how Shep describes Chelsea and the temptation to go after her.

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(Shep and Cameran weren’t laughing during their final convo this week)

“Do you not think that there is any part of you that is jealous of him?” Cameran asks.

“Just admit that you care. Oh my god. I call bullshit,” Cameran calls Shep out and it is satisfying as a viewer to see the TRUTH spelled out for Shep loud and clear. Grow up, please.

Until next time…

OMG JTT is Still Super Hot!

So you 90s kids must have watched Home Improvement starring Tim Allen. I know I did. Ruh-ruh-ruh! The growling-bark that was “Tim the Tool Man Taylor” trademark joke on the show.

Jonathan Taylor Thomas played the character of Randy. And even though I was only around 10 when I started watching the show, I was definitely randy for JTT.

Those beautiful blue eyes, tan skin, and sweet smile! Who could resist? Certainly not I.

Anyways, I haven’t seen anything about JTT for a long time and then BHAM out of nowhere, I’m on popsugar.com and I stumble upon the above glorious pic of Jonathan.

He’s taking a break from the spotlight since he says he was working since 8 years old. Yes, please take a break then, but don’t stop being hot.

HOT COUPLE ALERT: Joaquin Phoenix and Rooney Mara More Than a Rumour

I’ve been reading things here and there online, as you may also have been doing, for the last couple of months which suggest that Rooney Mara and Joaquin Phoenix were fucking and potentially super coupled-up on the down-low.

I guess they were because they finally stepped out as a couple at Cannes.

I think they’re both pretty hot! Crazy seeming too which always adds a flavour of excitement to the mix as in, “What’s going to happen with these two?”.

Rooney Mara Joaquin Phoenix same car Cannes

Rooney does appear pretty cold, but she won me over in her roles in Her, Carol, and especially Side Effects. Why didn’t people talk about Side Effects more when it came out? I like how Rooney perfectly embodied a female who is willing to manipulate the qualities about females that have typically been used to oppress women, such as the idea that we’re especially weak and vulnerable, and use it to her own advantage for evil means. I don’t want to give more away, because it will ruin the plot but check out Side Effects if you haven’t seen it. Channing Tatum, Catherine Zeta Jones, and Jude Law round out the cast. Side Effects is also film that takes a glaring look at the pharmaceutical industry. It examines how some mental health professionals take advantage of their power and operate as business people looking to profit from pharmaceutical companies rather than there to help their clients first and think about financial gain second.

Joaquin does do a good job of staying famous and still getting decent enough movies without ever letting the audience know too much about him. I’ve still never seen that documentary called I’m Still Here. I just tried again to find it on Pirate Bay today and there’s no downloads for it…too bad…I do really want to see it, even if it sucks just because of all the hype.

Phoenix made the doc with Casey Affleck (he has 2 kids, Indiana 12 and Atticus (oh wow, what a name) 8, with Phoenix’s sister Summer and they are now divorced), which I feel like is kind of an infamous film now since Affleck was accused of sexual harassment from other women who worked on the set of the documentary. According to IMDB the plot line of the documentary “Documenting Joaquin Phoenix’s transition from the acting world to a career as an aspiring rapper”. Hmm.

Joaquin Rooney cannes audience look

I first developed a big crush on Phoenix when I was a kid and I watched him as a 12 or 13 year-old in the film Parenthood. The film also has a young Keanu Reeves and Martha Plimpton. Anyways, Phoenix was really good and cute in the movie starring Steve Martin. I love him in The Master also, which co-starred Phillip Seymour Hoffman and Amy Adams. It’s supposed to be about L. Ron Hubbard (creator of Scientology if ya didn’t know). Of course, Walk the Line. They’re both actors that don’t seem to be desperately seeking constant attention from the public. That doesn’t mean their egos aren’t huge. I’m just saying because they don’t put it all out there, I am more curious about them, and what their personal lives are like.

Hope they’re having fun and I’m happy to look at pictures of the coupling Marix (it’s probably insulting to give them a couple name, but whatever) until they’re no more, unless of course they last forever.

Now I Can See Why Austen Kroll From Southern Charm Seems Older Than 29

During the most recent episode of Southern Charm (airing on May 22nd), Austen revealed at the parquet courts place that his older sister, Kyle, died when Austen was 7 and Kyle was 10. Chelsea was asking something I would have wanted to know also, which is why Austen has a younger sister who is 9 years younger than him.

He explains that his parents had another child after his older sister tragically fell off the side of a cliff while on a family vacation in the U.S. Chelsea’s eyes welled-up immediately, it made me sad too, and it helped me to understand that I find Austen to be a hot 23 year-old, which is so rare because I’m 33 and usually find men who are older than myself to be hottest, because he’s probably been through more than most people in his particular genre of privileged whitehood in the first 29 years of life.

 

 

Pam Anderson Finally Looks How I’ve Always Wanted Her To

Once upon a time I used to hate Pamela Anderson as a little girl. I didn’t like when it became public that Tommy Lee assaulted her (as a kid this was reported on whatever tabloid entertainment show I was watching that he caused her to have a miscarriage) I thought she was a fool for staying with such an idiot.

Anyways, then I started to see Pamela Anderson talk shows and I realized how funny and self-deprecating she is. She won a fan with me! I also loved her as C.J on Baywatch even though when I watched that show I disliked who I thought the real-life Pamela Anderson was.

Once I learned more about her personality she sucked me in and charmed me into being a fan. My sister and I used to always watch her campy show V.I.P. back in the day too.

Now Pam has gone the “classy lady” route, at least temporarily, as it seems she always like to get back to her roots eventually, in Cannes this year (if you want more pics of Pam at People.com click here).

She looks gorgeous! Any old pre-surgery photos of Pamela Anderson always indicated to me that she is just as beautiful as any other Hollywood or more respected actress.

Glad to see Canadian Pammy still kicking around and looking good!

The Ol’ “Kardashians Don’t Have Jobs” Argument: Demeaning Work Women Do

This is what never makes sense to me about people who hate reality TV because it is all “fake” but simultaneously argue that people like the Kardashians “don’t have jobs”. Yeah, entertainment, which is a huge stress relief for me, can involve making fake things or situations interesting because the fake scenarios are fun or interesting to watch (they might even relate in some ways to real life as well, I think they do). The “Kardashians don’t have jobs” argument was something I once again encountered last week when I attended my friend’s son’s 3rd birthday party.

One of my friend’s friends (who felt the need to emphasize that she is “not a feminist” so you can’t offend her…yet she was offended by almost everything the other people said at the party, interesting…) asked me what’s new with celebrity culture, and I said that Kim Kardashian is getting hated-on for joking about how the flu helped her lose weight and for saying it’s an an effective diet right before the MET Ball, but if you only consider whether or not a diet helps you lose weight. It is not depending on how physically harmful a diet is–it’s not that offensive. I’ll point out Kim never denied or commented on how dangerous flus are. I bet she realizes it’s not an ideal state to have the flu! One could say she was just looking at the bright side of things, but the sad reality is because of her famous and influence there are going to be some sick people trying to get themselves sick to lose weight. Kim Kardashian can’t be blamed for all of those people, but she should consider them when writing things like this on a public format.

Anyways, this led into my friend’s friend saying that the Kardashians don’t have jobs. My other friend’s boyfriend, who I know doesn’t watch or enjoy the Kardashians but gets that they’re business people and entertainers who are SUCCESSFUL at their jobs, was really getting into arguing with the friend’s friend that they do and I joined in as well. I eventually noticed myself getting way to into the argument and the topic changed shortly thereafter.

It’s funny because the same friend of a friend was just showing off earlier about how her life is good because she is cruising at her job and making $30 an hour. Aren’t the Kardashians just cruising at their jobs of dressing up, selling people products and their TV show, showing up for professional appearances and doing press, promoting themselves on various social media outlets and taking the best financial options available for their time (aka work)?

It seems to me that this critical female who wants to demean everything the Kardashians do (and yes I think they use their sexuality as one of their primary means of attracting attention and financial offers…it’s okay, I’m a fan and on board with hit…I love looking at beautiful women, what can I say? Supply and demand is a huge part of capitalism.) is somehow jealous of the Kardashians, because the argument that they don’t have jobs makes no sense.

Capitalism to me appears to me to involve people pursuing the best financial reward available for what they are willing and or able to offer up in return. The Kardashians are highly privileged individuals in the sense that their beauty, family heritage in Hollywood have helped them greatly in terms of their success, but they are still undeniably inspirational business women who have found ways to use what the Lord has given them (nope, I don’t believe in God, but I do like that statement and I like to capitalize for emphasis) and maximize their own personal bank accounts (financial status has a huge impact on one’s own personal freedom, which means being rich can be very empowering for women and create options that would simply NOT be there if the females weren’t rich).

So, this leads me to think that this friend of a friend is falling into something I notice that I still do as well in an attempt to put down a female that I dislike, which is to resort to the age-old virgin/whore complex. Bad women are whores: lazy, liars, etc. Good women are virgins: honest, sweet, submissive etc. And since Kim Kardashian has made a sextape some people will ignore everything else she has done that has taken lots and lots of TIME and ENERGY to claim she is a whore. See it’s not that easy to be born drop-dead gorgeous now is it? Kardashians ain’t nearly as bad as people say. I defend them because of the sexist, anti-feminist attitude behind the argument that the KARDASHIANS DON’T WORK.

Clearly, they do work–but those who criticize the Kardashians don’t value all work, only the kinds of work they think are respectable I guess. It’s so weird actors who are on scripted shows are viewed as having jobs, but reality TV actors on shows everyone freaks-out about being scripted and totally staged doesn’t involve real work? Scripts. Stages. Sounds like working as an actor but they’re playing themselves to me. Makes no goddamn sense. This is another part of this weird delusional reality projected forth by people who are jealous that certain individuals got a way better deal in the whole realm of capitalism and financial gain than they did. Yes, the Kardashians make way more money than you do for doing work that is possibly easier than yours, but it’s not like able-bodied people are quick to give up their wage which can be higher because there are more jobs available to able-bodied people, because someone who is incapable of moving their body and is disability and can’t make a lot of money? People are inherently selfish, but it seems like most people want to deny this in themselves. I don’t deny it about myself. I have a regular job, but I also call up my Mom’s (she’s 55) 87 year-old ex-boyfriend every few months or so in great part because I know he’ll usually send me a cheque for around $5000 after. Does it feel dirty? Yep. But I like cash. If you’re above money, good for you. I don’t need to pretend my financial status doesn’t have a great impact on a lot of things (but of course not everything) in my life.